Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
