nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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