my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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