wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
