Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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