Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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