to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
