return my video game
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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