i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
