The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
You dont lie about slip and slides
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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