How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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