Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
