So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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