His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.