do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
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