We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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