hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
