Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
