You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
