i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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