I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
