i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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