I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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