if i can run in heels then i can drive
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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