Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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