Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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