RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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