All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
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You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
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you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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