I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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