for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
well you can't waste a boner
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
did you just send me my own nude
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
