I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
