is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Randomize