So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize