chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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