I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i dont even know how to be here
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize