We tried having a conversation with our noses.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
