best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
