This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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