have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
