not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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