I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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