Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.