i don't like sucking hair
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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