please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
