I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
