Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Princesses don't give blow jobs
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
