I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
