Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
