What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
