HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
